I have been meditating on stuff. My room is generally cluttered.  Many things in my house do not have an assigned place, so clothes, papers, and electronics are tossed on to other things or balanced on “the chair.”  The chair, of course, is not used for sitting, but used instead as a depository for the clothes that pass the smell test.  This is how I have always lived and no organizational intervention has changed my habits.  The obvious analysis of this is that it is a metaphor for my thoughts and my body.  My thoughts feel cluttered and my body needs to clean up the mess inside.  I know this.  Life has been moving so fast, that I am taking this week to remind myself to tidy up – the tangible and the intangible.  Even in rehearsal today, we gathered up the loose ends and tossed what we did not need anymore.  In my classes, I want to focus on detoxing and decluttering.  I am taking my Bubbie’s advice.  Bubbie is my 91 year old grandmother who emails me almost everyday.  Here is an email from last week:

“Take care of yourself. Peanut Butter. Go thru your drawers. You may discover a treasure.”

For context, here is an older message explaining the peanut butter:

“Have a good Tuesday. Good Luck. Keep the motor going.  Eat your energy food. Peanut Butter.”

Back to going thru the drawers … I was visiting a friend last weekend and we discussed this topic a lot.  She is in a new apartment with a new born and not a lot of storage space.  Advice to her was, “when deciding what to get rid of, ask yourself ‘do I love it?”  This process feels like such a gift.  Getting rid of the items on the to do lists or the professional interests that do not feed me.  I am hoping this them of making space and decluttering will inform my classes this week.  I will be teaching contact improv on Thursday night and Yoga on Friday.  I will also be wrapping up the conference from last week, writing a fundraising proposal, and working at the hospital.  Welcoming May with a little more lightness and clarity.

I am grateful to have this platform to process the many great lessons I learn from friends and fierce forces in my life.  As I write, I am reminded of the closing remarks at The Field Network conference relentlessly delivered with gusto.  She encouraged us to do less with more.  She encouraged self-care.  I heard it as a call to simply and press the refresh button over and over.  To let go of the junk and refocus, refocus, refocus on what makes us happy.  Ok, 1.5 hours until I bus to the Dance Metro DC‘s “Writing about your Work” workshop.  Time to kick off the week with 30 minutes of decluttering.

Focus: Spring cleaning of the physical space around me, the mind, and the body.

There are dancers everywhere.  Who knows who else is one.  In our DC metro area, there are so many people I never cross paths with.  I adjudicated the 2015 New Releases showcase yesterday, and I only new a quarter of the artists.  There were choreographers from Lanham, MD, Alexandria, VA and other far off and distant lands.  How can we feel more connected?  How can we share our resources?  I am reminded of the transient nature of our city.  It doesn’t matter that I have been here for 10 years or that I teach/rehearse/work all over town.  I have consciously stepped back a little bit from taking class and seeing shows to have some more personal time, but still … there are so many new connections to make.  I love meeting other dancers.  I hope for more experiences like yesterday.  I also hope that all of the artists who auditioned, keep working on their piece, or make this maybe not so great piece so that they can make great work later.  There are resources out there.  They are the perfect candidates for Fieldwork – organized, driven, and disciplined artists.  Speaking of Fieldwork – The Spring Fieldwork Showing is Wednesday and then the workshop starts up again in the Fall!  I am performing a work-in-progress called Sync. Another inspiring 10 weeks complete.

Focus: To celebrate the little victories.
During the week, if we look a little closer, what beauty is right in front of our nose?  Let’s acknowledge it!  Instead of pointing out what is missing or what we did not do, let’s build from a positive place.

Tomorrow, The Field Network is convening in DC for our Annual Conference.  We are welcoming 7 other cities and have planned 2 days focused on advocacy/policy and capacity building.  During this expected whirlwind, I want to find moments to pause and notice and celebrate something good or take note of what I want to think about further.  I also want to note others’ small successes … to reiterate a comment or movement that moved me.  Dream list for The Field/DC, while it is on my mind:
-encourage anyone who has auditioned for anything to take their piece through fieldwork
-culinary artists in fieldwork
-creating a fieldwork focused group that businesses can market test ideas on
-have fieldwork in University curriculum

I am grateful that I have dance in the mix this week … from the cerebral to the  kinesthetic and back and forth.  I will also be at the hospital working with caregivers and patients.  The week finishes off with a gathering of the BodyWise teaching artists to provide professional development peer-to-peer and support one another in our classes.

A friend of a friend described her artist life as having three parts: the art, the social, and the healing.  Hearing this clarified the what’s and the why’s of my life up until now.  This was the answer to why I have continued to nurture some passions and let go of others.  Right now, I love performing with Tia Nina and other interdisciplinary artists, I love Fieldwork and running The Field/DC, and I love my work as a movement artist at Georgetown Lombardi and The VA.  Teaching is a persistent younger sister to the art, the social, and the healing – I love her and I find her challenging sometimes.

These passions evolved by choice and by necessity.  Artist must do many things to be artists.  I know that you are supposed to tailor your resume to the job or the grant that you are applying for, but I am not sure why.  My whole self is what allows me to do all these different things better and continue to get better.  Maybe the connection between guided imagery and feminist punk rock performance isn’t obvious but it is there!  Both demand body awareness.  Both encourage you to take up space and be yourself.  Both do not apologize or judge.  I have to express myself loudly and put myself in uncomfortable situations.  I have to go against the norm and invite people to think a little differently.

Last week, while I was visiting family and friends in Boston, my friend’s husband asked me how “the dancing” was going.  I answered that I love my work but I want to integrate them more.  A goal of mine is to have a focus each week across the board – whether I am teaching a Shibashi class to veterans, or rehearsing a partnering duet for Tia Nina.   What am I interested in right now?  What is my secret thesis this week and how does it evolve to next week?  On a subconscious level, this is happening.  Each art activity informs the others and helps me grow as an artist.  I am hoping that this blog can help me draw these connections.   This is a self-study that you are invited into.

This week I am planning a national conference with other Field directors, teaching classes in movement improv, yoga, and Shibashi, rehearsing Tia Nina, showing work-in-progress at Fieldwork, adjudicating a dance showcase, and providing stretch breaks and guided imagery to hospital nurses and patients.  Focus: embracing the imbalance.